I was working on this week’s entry at my local watering hole- don’t judge. While having a conversation with an older gentleman, I came up with this week’s topic.
After I told him what I was busy doing on my iPad, he said, “What does a woman mean when she says that she needs space?”
After a long laugh, I said, “It means you should run.” “I need space,” could mean anything from her actually needing emotional space, to your leaving dirty clothes on the floor has caused her to want you to give her physical space, or anything else in between.” It could also mean the Cowboys are destined to win the Super Bowl.
We shared a laugh and I told him that women tend to be more complicated than men. If a man says he needs space, he’s not trying to use scare tactics to coerce you into a long term commitment. He probably, for whatever reason, has grown tired of the current arrangement.
Conversely, ladies, be careful what you tell a man. Their natural instinct is to fix things. Think of the last time you told your partner that you had a problem of any kind. I’m sure they tried to fix your problem in their own way. It validates their manhood. It makes them feel like they can be in control. To that end, if you are sending out false smoke signals, attempting to control a situation or force an outcome; you may end up with a literal reaction.
What does all of this mean? I’ll answer with an anecdote. Prior to leaving the house, my sister told my three year old nephew to takes his pants off because of a stain. She literally meant he should take off his pants and put on a clean pair. Unfortunately, all he heard was “Take your pants off.” So, what happened? We ended up at the park 30 minutes later and he was sans pants, as she didn’t notice his lack of attire on the way out of the house.
Ladies, little boys are little men, and they are both very literal. Say what you mean and mean what you say and leave out all of the in between.
Ask Janine, Courtesy of ToyClosetNYC.com
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Before we get to know each other, I want to introduce myself. I am the co-owner of an online/home-party adult toy novelty company. I have encountered thousands of women along this journey that began almost five years ago. I started out selling toys and other adult novelties at ladies-only parties throughout the NY/NJ/CT tri-state area. From the first woman that confided intimate details about her sex life, to the many men that have asked me for tips; I've enjoyed every minute of this journey. I'm honored to be sharing with you. You're a new audience, so I'll take it slow; but hopefully we'll laugh and grow together. I'll be sharing relationship advice, sex tips and much more. You may not always agree, but please understand; I am just a girl with an opinion about a lot of things. So, I hope you grow to like the new column, “Ask Janine”. Janine, ToyClosetNYC.comView all Ask Janine posts.